Take off hose-head. My name is Sanjana, but I am no McKenzie. And this land of yours may be great, but it sure isn’t white.
Will you at least have a beer and some donuts??
Okay Bullzeye, I will drink your good Cantadian beer. Now just leave me alone. Your sexuality confuses even me, and I’m just an inflatable banana.
Okay peeps, so here we go. After beating Bullzeye in 11 straight games of beer hunter (he’ll never learn) I left for a weekend of frivolity in the near northern part of Ontario, otherwise known by Torontonians as Cottage Country. Just remember, a weekend of cottaging in Ontario is decidedly different than a weekend of cottaging in England. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but this is a family adventure. The Yoffer family to be exact.
Interesting side note here. Turns out this byoffer fellow is not By-Offer, but rather B.Yoffer, or just Yoffer. Much in the same way that J.Slice is Slicey. So henceforth here I will refer to the Yoffer family.
Our adventure began with a 2 hour drive out of Toronto. I was a little antsy at first, as there was a cat on the scene and those claws always skeer us inflatable types. Luckily the cat got dropped off at the cat spa (read Nana and Papa’s house) and we were claw-free for the weekend. Not a worry in the world for an inflatable banana… or so I thought.
After the drive I needed to unwind, so YofferGirl took me down to the lake to air out.
Talk about a lot of open space. Bee-you-ti-ful! I haven’t seen that much air since that weekend in San Fran with whats-her-name *coughBraviecough*
After some fresh air YofferBoy suggested we stretch out for a bit. After 2 hours in the car I would have expected him to have more energy, but…
Enough of this lounging around – I was looking for a little action! YofferGirl and YofferBoy thought I might like a turn at archery…
But their idea of participation skeered me more than the damn cat!!
So I called foul and put an end to that game. YofferBoy had another suggestion, but nice as he is, he just doesn’t relate well to the plight of the inflatable banana!
Finally I was able to talk YofferBaby (YofferToddler?) into some play time. This kid really gets me.
That was so much fun, I decided to let the little whipper-snapper take me for a ride in the canoe…
It was really cool – we even saw a turtle sunning on a log…
Then we played a really cool game that was basically 39 days compressed into a few minutes. They say no man is an island, but the same can’t be said for a banana. It should come to no-ones surprise that someone with my pedigree should end up as the Sole Survivor…
When we returned from all that canoeing it was time to enjoy the water and work on my tan. I feel a bit bad for making Yoffer look so white. He just couldn’t keep up to my natural tan. YofferBoy, on the other hand, obviously gets out in the sun more than his father.
I didn’t want to get too much sun, as no-one likes a banana with age spots, so I retired to the shade. Now Yoffer called this a chair hammock, but to me it looked a lot like one of those “special activity chairs” they sell on the back of Hustler magazine. Oh wait, this is a family adventure, and besides, there are children’s toys in the picture.
While I was relaxing I decided to help myself to a nice cold Canadian beverage. Yoffer kept saying something about "the pride of Nova Scotia"…
I have to come clean here – I drank too much. Being American I just wasn’t ready for that high-octane Canadian beer. So I lay down on Yoffer’s bed for a rest, and had visions of Stanley Cups running through my head…
I was resting nicely when all of a sudden Mrs. Yoffer woke me up…
Let’s just say in respect of the family nature of this thread that my mind is blank on the next several hours. and everyone promise not to tell Yoffer, mkay??
After all that time in bed I needed a real sleep, so I crashed with the YofferKidlets. Poor YofferGirl, she drew the short stick and got the couch, while I scored the bottom bunk.
Sunday was another great day in the sun. The water was great, the sun was shining, and everyone was in good spirits. Alas, it was time to leave, and move on to another leg of my Amazing Race: Banana Edition. Thanks to the Yoffer family for all of their hospitality, and special thanks to Mrs. Yoffer for her special hospitality.
Now on to see some Seana lady. I sure hope she makes Rice Krispie Squares for me!
1 comment:
Yay for Sanjana pictures!
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